Welcome to the middle of my night.

Welcome to the middle of my night. Where I have already gone through hours of tossing and turning. Thinking about work. Trying to get comfortable anyway I can. Maybe I’m too dry.. Lotion applied and trying again… nope. That had a slight chance. My leg isn’t stiff today even with the longer workout. Yoga must be working for it. You can feel the effects of the prednisone on the repaired tendon, and its only day two of taking it. Better keep an eye on that.

Today marks my fourth night in a row of not sleeping. The length of my insomnia attacks are lasting longer.. used to be three and I’d crash.. Now it’s five.. It really sucks.

But here is what you think about or maybe learn while you attempt to sleep.

Tonight it is that the chest pressure or ache may be something I should have looked at. Don’t spook Hubz.. But as I turned from side to side trying to get comfortable I noticed that my favorite side tends to increase  the pressure. and be harder to breathe on after a fashion. Probably why I have been favoring the other side, recently. I’ll get to the really scary part in a second, but I’m gonna back track a few days to add some stuff. Stuff that Hubz knows about. Last Saturday I was driving and had some chest pain. This isn’t out of the ordinary. I’ve learned to live with it since I had a cardiologist tell me that I was young and healthy and “shouldn’t have any problems”. Even though my heart rate run high, and skips beats.. nothing wrong, right?? AND heart problems have KILLED people on both side of my family. But I’m not a doctor.. I just know something isn’t working right. I just can’t find someone to listen. But, I digress. So driving and chest pain.. Like I can’t hide it chest pain. I cried out, grabbed my chest and proceeded to almost blackout while driving. Luckily, I had Hubz in the car yelling at me. It lasted only a few seconds. The really intense pain. Lasted for less than two blocks. Then I could get air back in my lungs and then it was a dull roar.. I guess if I think about it, that was when I started having problems breathing. But have chalked it up to allergies affect on my asthma. It’s been so windy, and I have been having an allergic reaction to SOMETHING.. Thus the prednisone.. FYI, Hubz does not know about the almost passing out.. let’s keep that between us. So onto tonight’s scary. As I flip and flop and try to sleep and try to breathe, I realize that there is something very different about laying on my favorite side. It’s not just that the breathing is harder. Or the ache is more prominent. It’s very quiet. Too quiet. It takes me a minute to figure it out. I can’t hear my heartbeat.

Something is very wrong.

I turn back over to the other side and sure enough I hear a very strong beat resonating in my ear. the pressure has lessoned. I lay on my back, take a deep breathe. I can still feel the ache. I can feel the ache now as I sit here. If I had to guess, I would say the upper right quadrant of my heart has an issue. But again.. I am not a doctor.. And we all know they don’t listen until its too late. But I did roll around a few times testing my theory.. and each time.. same result..

Now, I’m afraid to try to sleep. Forget freaking out Hubz.. I’m kinda freaking out!!!

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